I'm the Daniel Tosh of Blogging

Daniel Tosh does a bit in which he describes his ability to take a decent joke and then make it weirder… and weirder… and weirder… until only one person is still laughing.

I tried to find a clip of it online to show you, but I couldn't find one because apparently I'm that one person who actually thinks it's funny.

Anyway, that's kind of how my blog is.  (Assuming anyone ever laughs in the first place.) 

Let's take a look at some successful comedic blogs, like The Bloggess, or Hyperbole and a Half, or Just Inappropriate.  These bloggers poke fun at themselves, but in an endearing way.  They recount childhood mishaps or describe their kids doing something embarrassing, or they make observations of every day life that people can relate to.  They describe themselves in awkward social situations and put all their vulnerabilities and insecurities on the Internet, yet in such a way that everybody loves them.  The Bloggess and Hyperbole and a Half have both gotten book deals.  Just Inappropriate is still pretty new, but she's got 43 followers.  You could divide my followers into that 3 times and still have 0.35 of a person left over.  That person probably would not be very happy, or alive.  My blog probably wouldn't even get the good part of the person, like the torso.  I'd probably get the feet.  The torso would be like, "Screw this, I'm spending my last 30 seconds on earth reading the good blogs."

Think about my blog compared to those blogs.  I draw myself as a pus-filled monster.  I don't have kids to talk about.  As a matter of fact, I often gripe about kids getting on my nerves.  Sometimes I also gripe about adults getting on my nerves.  So I manage to offend pretty much my entire potential readership, unless there's an alien race out there somewhere that hates adult earthlings and loves hearing about my cats.

I am so socially inept that I can't even write about being socially inept.

Maybe someday I'll get offered a book deal by the Ursa Minor Division of Simon & Schuster.

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